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Why do women cheat?

Дмитрий КарпачовДмитрий Карпачов

Why do women cheat?
Why do women cheat?

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World literature is full of stories about women's infidelity, from the classic Anna Karenina and Madame Bovary to the pop movies Valley of the Dolls and Bridges of Madison County. And statistics say that, according to various sources, 15-25% of women have cheated on their regular partners. Of course, this figure is three times lower than that of men (55-75%), but it's not so small if we remember the widespread belief that it is generally difficult for a woman to decide to cheat.

Let's look at the reasons for adultery on the part of the beautiful half of humanity. Why do women have lovers we will tell in the article.

Statistics of female infidelity

What is female infidelity? A fleeting flirtation with a waiter in a restaurant? Desperate revenge on an unfaithful husband? A "drunken" kiss? What about a platonic relationship that can last for years – is it cheating or not? Not everything is so simple and unambiguous.

There are also controversial moments in the moral plane: how many women are ready to overcome themselves? How many of them will justify their actions, and how many will blame themselves for the rest of their lives for the weakness they have shown?

To clarify the issue of women's infidelity, let's look at the results of public opinion polls:

84% of women condemn adultery.

Modern women are more prone to cheating than women of the previous generation.

More than a third of women who cheat do not consider their marriages to be unsuccessful.

Women's infidelity peaks between the ages of 25 and 34 (more than 85% of infidelities).

57% of women are in love with the person they are cheating with.

68% of women would easily cheat on their husbands if they were sure that no one would ever find out.

These statistics shatter some myths about women's infidelity. For example, only dishonest, easily accessible women cheat on their husbands.

It is worth noting that all of the above data was obtained through an anonymous survey. This fact gives rise to a statistical error, because, as you know, men tend to exaggerate the number of their "exploits" on the love front, while women, on the contrary, tend to downplay them. True information can only be obtained by establishing a trusting relationship with the respondent.

A curious fact: in 2016, the UK conducted a major genetic study of biomaterials from married British women. About 5 thousand women took part in the experiment. As it turned out, 11% of their children were not from their legal spouses, and most of the mothers did not even know about it. After the study, divorces started pouring in, and there was a desire to find out who the biological fathers of these children were.

We even had to resort to non-standard methods, such as hypnosis, to go back in time. It turned out that these were casual encounters: in a bar, with colleagues at work, casual acquaintances. After sleeping together once, the women would cross their lovers out of their lives and completely forget about their affairs.

This study has made it possible to question the usual rate of female infidelity - 25%. At least in large cities, we can safely say that 40% of married women have one-time or ongoing affairs.

 

Top 7 Reasons Why Women Have Lovers

The psychology of female infidelity is an extremely complex area of study. It is as multifaceted as the woman herself. Due to her flexible psyche, incredible resilience in difficult life circumstances, and emotional claims to marriage in general and a particular man in particular, the causes of female infidelity are extremely diverse.

  1. Problems in the sexual sphere. It can be a mismatch of temperaments when a husband wants it twice a month, and a wife needs it more often. And unacceptable sexual preferences. And male sexual dysfunction. People are not used to solving such problems in the office of a sexologist or family psychologist. Some suppress the accumulated discontent (as you know, for the time being), while others realize their sexual potential on the side.
  2. Filling the emotional and communicative void in marriage. No matter how intense the passion was at the start of the relationship, emotions subside over the years. And there is not always the moral strength, time, and desire to keep this fire burning. Partners grow apart, their marriage becomes a formal cohabitation, and each has their own life, the nuances of which they prefer not to let each other in on. Men throw themselves into their work, prioritizing their duty to provide financially for their families. And women wither away without attention, affection, and emotional intimacy with their spouses. But as the saying goes, a holy place is never empty. Over time, someone comes along who fills the space in a woman's soul. It doesn't matter if it's a one-time relationship, a light flirtation, or a permanent lover. The main thing is to be happy for a minute.
  3. Revenge. Not only an eye for an eye, that is, for cheating on a man. One of the main reasons why a married woman needs a lover. The motives can be different: bad attitude (physical, emotional, or sexual abuse), protracted conflicts, pathological greed of the husband, etc. The plot of the American TV series Desperate Housewives successfully illustrates revenge in the form of adultery: the beautiful Gaby sleeps with a gardener because of her husband's lack of attention. He pays her off with a diamond necklace, but she needs his love and care.
  4. Thirst for new sensations. Even though this reason is more typical for men, women are also no strangers to the desire to diversify their sex life with a new partner. And this can happen against the backdrop of a perfectly harmonious relationship in marriage. You just can't eat the same borscht every day.
  5. Marriage of convenience. When there is no mutual passion between the spouses from the beginning, cheating is only a matter of time. Even if one of them loves passionately, and the other allows himself to be loved, it is unlikely that this relationship will pass the test of strength. Therefore, when deciding on a marriage of convenience, you need to think carefully about whether the game is worth the candle.
  6. Self-doubt. A woman's unfulfilled potential hurts her self-esteem. An affair on the side helps restore her reputation and prove that she is good at something. Her career didn't work out, her husband ate pears, and her children don't listen to her... but she has a lover, a young and handsome man.
  7. Material and non-material benefits. Not so much a banal payment for sex as the achievement of goals. The most common type of adultery is for the sake of career advancement. None of the successful, accomplished women will ever admit what it cost them. But, according to statistics, ¾ of women are ready to have sex for a career.

 

These are not all the reasons why a woman has a lover. The motivations are so diverse that it will not be possible to describe them all in one article.