Female competition is an important skill for life: how to develop the ability to compete
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How often do we women compete with each other? Regularly, without even noticing it. Female competition is absolutely natural in a woman's nature.
The ability to engage in and withstand healthy competition is learned during childhood through contact with mom.
It is a very important skill for a woman's life. Because competition throughout life is a natural process in any woman's life and it is important to have healthy competitiveness.
If this skill is not developed or hypertrophied, a woman will spend her entire life fighting the windmills of low self-esteem, or narcissistic presentation.
It's like the samurai anecdote: "the samurai has no goal, only a path."
Let's begin to understand what female competition consists of... "Female competition and its manifestations". Healthy female competition is an absolutely natural part of a woman's life. As I said before, it is important for a woman to have a stable female identity. Then a woman is free in her presentation to the world, stable in her interactions. Such a woman is confident in herself, in her value and she has no need to enter into unnecessary competition.
But if we talk about different types of female competition, there is a category of women for whom competition is a way to confirm to herself that I am a woman. As a rule, these are women who often boast, praise themselves, mostly judging other women, finding in this way their superiority. They look confident on the outside. But in reality, inside they are in constant doubt about their identity. And in order to feel their feminine identity is stable, they have to constantly compete. Constant struggle is their path. For men, for recognition among women, for a place in the social hierarchy of the environment that attracts them, for their superiority among other women. In childhood, the girl won the mother's competition for her father, the girl was praised beyond measure, she could be in coalition with her father against her mother.
Or if there was no father, the mother instilled superiority and arrogance in the girl. But female identity was formed with a bias and a need to constantly compete. To prove to herself her worth to other women. "Fear of Competition." We all have different fears and it's normal for us to survive. Fear of competition is an evolutionary fear. But it is very disruptive to people in different areas of life. Regardless of which area of life this fear arises in, the way to get rid of it is the same.
There are two reasons for this fear:1. You are afraid to be yourself.2. Derived from the first, you do not know what you are in fact and what your uniqueness. And consequently, you don't see the value in it.
It's all about Valuing yourself. When we don't value ourselves, we have nothing to lean on inside. We are then afraid to stick out, to compete.
Ask yourself a question and answer it in writing:- What is my uniqueness? - What do I do better than others in my environment! - What am I good/good at as a woman or man.- Why do I love myself? What don't I love myself for? And if there are many "no's", ask for each of the points, how it affects my life, what can I do differently to change it. Working on your own self worth is very interesting. And forming internal supports gives resilience, builds self-confidence. Then competition ceases to be such an urgent event. It turns from competition into cooperation. Or there is no need for competition at all. And the rival or rival is seen as just a woman or a man, different from us. And a competitor at work, just an employee who also wants the best for himself and goes to his goal of increasing earnings like you.